To Be or Not To Be. . . Happy

As individuals, we have the power of cultivating our own happiness — or at least being less sad.

You have to work for everything in life: a nice house, a great job, a stunning body — and even, happiness. So how exactly does one 'work' for happiness?

Although a controversial claim, I believe happiness levels can be managed through applying daily habits. I have found that going out of my way to change my routine and remaining consistent with these changes has drastically improved my happiness levels.

Here are my 7 best practices that you can implement in your own life to be happy:

1. Cut off Unhealthy Relationships

You can't expect yourself to be a happy or even positive person if the people you surround yourself with don't attract those things. There is no point in trying to improve yourself when you are actively participating in relationships that keep you stuck in place or drag you down. Friendships, romantic relationships, or even co-workers can completely change your mood.

It might be hard at first (especially if it's a long-term relationship), but it's better to let go and deal with the pain now than the consequences of the long-lasting unhappiness from keeping them around.

2. Start Feeling Yourself

Okay, so it's not good to be cocky and full of yourself, but confidence is key to supplying you with the courage you will need down the line to do other stuff that makes you happy. So wear whatever makes you feel good, listen to music that makes you feel empowered, maybe spend some extra time doing your hair/makeup, and hype yourself up! Taking care of yourself and crediting yourself can make you feel like an all-around more positive person.

For me, sending pictures I've taken to my friends makes me feel a lot better! Sometimes, we can be our own harshest critics, so it's a relief to hear how you might be overthinking it; just give credit where it's due! I've experienced downplaying my accomplishments (little or big) and that's made me get trapped in an ever-lasting emptiness: nothing I do is enough.

So, I started feelin' my self! I realized how I should be proud that I woke up early to do my morning routine and proud for being able to land an internship. My confidence recently grew to the point where I was able to finally cut my hair the shortest it has ever been. . . and I am so much happier with my hair now!

It's important to be thankful towards others, but practicing self-gratitude can help avoid feeling unfulfilled. When you acknowledge and feel content with how far you have come, you will be more confident. That confidence is what will guide you to apply for that new job, buy that tight dress, or ask that girl out. That confidence is what will foster the headspace you need to partake in other activities that can make you happy.

3. Remember:

“Misery loves company.”

The worst thing you can do when you're feeling sad is to give in to temptations that remind you of how sad you are. Sure, it's good to address your feelings, but listening to that "FML" playlist on Spotify or insta-stalking someone (only to bad mouth them to your friends) isn't productive to healing. It might feel good in the moment to lock yourself in a dark room and cry in your bed, but self-pity can only take you so far.

So, feel your sadness — but be productive about it! Talk to your friends, go to therapy, or even journal — whatever you do, don't keep dragging out your sadness through counterproductive actions. If you feel like doing something toxic, have something in place to keep you busy.

As a college student, I always have things I could be studying, homework I need to be doing, or chores I need to finish. At the end of the day, if you're restless enough to do something that's only going to hurt you more, you're restless enough to use that energy for good. Try it, stick to it, and see how it changes your life.

4. Workout

Put the excuses aside, wake up early, and make time for it: trust me, it's worth it.

I had a phase where I spent most of my days in a slump. I neglected working out because I told myself I was too busy, and even though I was still visibly fit, I was mentally drained. I told myself there was no way I had the energy to workout when I didn't even have the energy to *exist*. When I finally stopped psyching myself out and got back into working out, I gained more energy. Now, I have my own personal gym set-up at my home and I'm on my way to getting my certification as a personal trainer.

Working out has given me the patience to attain results, the endorphins to be happier, and the feeling of being more productive. There is literally nothing to lose and everything to gain from working out. So, whether it's going for a run in your neighborhood or following an at-home workout, just do it!

5. Friends, Family, and Faith

The flip side to making sure you aren't keeping toxic people in your life is ensuring you're holding on to the ones that matter! Life is pretty serious, but it's important to make time to hang out with friends and spend time with family. Also, faith has played a major role in my life. I accredit the reason I am where I am today, and who I am today, to the strong faith that I hold. Even if not on a certain diety, I think it's beneficial for one's happiness to have faith in a better tomorrow.

It's pretty hard to go on with happiness without a source of love, a feeling of belonging, and a symbol of hope. Friends, family, and faith have been the "three F's" that I make sure to keep a constant relationship with in order to work towards happiness.

6. The Dog Days

Have you ever noticed how excited dogs get when you're home after going out for a grocery-run? Have you noticed how much they lick their lips when you bring out the same treat you always offer them? Have you ever noticed how protective a dog is towards their oldest, dirtiest toy? What if we, as humans, implemented a little bit of that into our lives?

My dog Coco is accredited to being the reason for my happiness (or at least, a great deal of it). He is a six-year-old chihuahua mix who is my light and joy! I adopted him when I was in middle school, so he has been with me through pretty much everything. He is the most handsome boy, he protects me with all his might, and gives the best licks n' kisses! Taking him out on walks, spending some extra time to give him treats, or playing catch with him in the morning with the sun glaring on his golden-tan coat has led me to appreciate the little things in life.

Imagine enjoying the little things in life as much as a dog does — how different would your life become? Coco (aka my ladies man / golden boy) has inspired me to simplify life, and that contrary to popular belief, there is nothin' wrong with livin' life in The Dog Days!

7. Keep Saying It

Finally, speak your happiness into existence. Tell yourself how happy you are, look at things from the glass half-full, and give advice to others on how to cultivate such happiness! Even if you don't believe in it yourself, studies have shown time and time again people who go out of their way to foster that idea of happiness actually start fostering it (check out: https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2019/04/190412094728.htm).

So just smile more, say it to yourself, and attract away!

Anyways, I think that's enough thinking, so that's all — for now.